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I can relate a lot to what you describe. My mom and my dad were authorative in a way, but laissez faire in another way (neglect). They cant give emotional support and I didnt talk with them about the **** I went through as a child, adolescent or adult. My wife couldnt give me what I needed and I wonder if thats my fault. I learned a lot from schema therapy, have you had that?
And I was against meds for a long time but when the **** really hit the fan I didnt resist anymore. I wish I got the right treatment earlier. I hope you will and feel better soon.
TC
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Dx: Mix anhedonia with Bipolar II. Add some insomnia and chronic stress. Season with paroxetine and a pinch of ADD. Stir well to induce a couple of hypo/manic episodes. After the excess of energy is gone, remove the Paroxetine and serve chilled with some C-PTSD and GAD. Ready is your MDD.
Mx: To clean up the mess use lamotrigine, risperidon, mirtazapine and sertraline. Let it soak in for a while but keep a close eye on it. Meanwhile enjoy your desert of oxazepam/temazepam prn.
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