Sunny,
I was re-reading this thread and the followng quote resonated with me:
</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
From almost the very beginning, self disclosure has been a part of our therapy.
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I have come to realize that this is true for my therapy as well. To use your term, T's self disclosure is "sprinkled" throughout our sessions. It is in this disclosure that I find a common bond with T. For instance our children went to the same school, and this made me realize we have common parental experiences. It makes me feel closer to him. Yesterday, during the horrific phone conversation, he shared that he was on his way to help his son move into the college dorm. I asked what college, he told me and it was just a nice addition to the conversation, helping to smooth over the rough spots and normalize it somewhat.
I respect his boundaries as he respects mine.