Hello shattered sanity: Yes... I sometimes have a similar experience. All of a sudden, for no apparent reason, my consciousness is accosted by visions of the sheer horror, loss & destruction of my life (most of which I perpetrated myself... life among the ruins...) It can feel like a monstrous dark wave engulfing me. I have adopted a practice of trying to lean into it... smile to it & breath into it. I send warm thoughts your way with the hope that you are able to find, within yourself, the ability to dwell in deep peace...