Hi Melmo and welcome to the BP area of the forum. I talked to you in the anxiety area about you possibly being dysphoric and BP.

I actually have a thread in here about how I've been fantasizing about revenge on my old boss and coworkers. So yes I understand. And I got a lot of mixed replies. No I'm not going to act on my thoughts but one can dream right? I usually only get these thoughts about people that have hurt me or screwed me over in life. It is obsessive and many people with BP get this. When you finally get in to see a pdoc and T then maybe discus this or meds that can help with these kind of thoughts. I'm on risperdal (as I told you, for my anger) and it does help. So I take it only when I'm like this (I could take it every day but I take it as needed). You're not alone here and we're all here for you. In the back on my mind of course I HOPE you don't have BP and dysphoria but I think at this point you need to be screened asap. I hope you feel better soon and get the care you need. ((Hugs)). Feel free to PM me if you're feeling really bad and just need to talk.

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