I take ECT to help with my suicidal thoughts and it has really helped. I have MDD with anxiety. Today I heard some bad news at work and now I want to stop my ECT because it makes me care. It makes me care what my suicide would do to others. It makes me care about life and I don't want to care anymore. Caring is too exhausting. I know you all can't help me just needed to vent.

Thank you