Dear G, so 2 weeks ago we had our last session, and you won't believe what I did. I can hardly believe it myself. I quit spiritual direction, and I don't think you would understand if I told you about it. But then again, other things I thought you wouldn't understand, you did. Anyway, I just can't do it. I thought it was going to be a good thing for me. I also thought the soul care evenings would be a good thing for me, but 3 out of the five times I've gone, I cried so much that all my makeup came off. I don't even know exactly why I cried so hard. And the thing is, I'm not sure I want to know. I don't want to focus on all the sad and angry things anymore. I don't want to explore why, after all the work we've done, I still can't bring myself to go back to church. I want to be done with that and focus on the happy things, like all the beautiful little children at work who give me so much joy. I just want to live my life now, instead of analyzing it all the time.