I'm feeling numb and I know it must be sadness and heartache. But I can neither feel the pain nor move forward. Instead I am just tired. I don't have ideas, I don't feel like talking, I just want to sit and stare at the wall. I wish I could do something to feel alive. Nothing is fun. I try to do yoga, read, but I am being uncreative and bored and nothing is fun anymore. Last week was good, I felt alive and I was happy and saw friends, did some shopping, worked on my paper. Right now I can't even remember how that felt. It seems ages ago.