I just now have remember a disassociative episode that I had experienced a couple years ago. It repeated a couple days later. I went outside of a Dennys restaurant to get in my car. Just when I reached out with a key to unlock the door, the next moment came where I did not know where I was, I did not know what I was doing, and I had no idea what was in front of me. I did not recognise the car as being a car. I heard a familiar sound coming from the background but could not comprehend what is was. Everything was incomprehensible to me. This lasted what I think was several minutes. My mind kept reaching out for my bearings. A picture of a a familiar face came to mind. But I did not know who he was at that moment. I just felt he was some kind of freind. Then it all came quickly back to me. I was OK once again. That sound that I was hearing was of traffic on the road right next to the parking lot. That picture in my head turned out to be the freind that I had just talked to in the restaurant.

A few days later, I was driving around trying to find an Urgent Care facility that I knew was somewhere around there. I then had this completely lost feeling quickly come over me. I stopped recognizing where I was and what I was doing. I had stopped with a road in front of me. I did not know which direction to go. I was completely and utterly lost. I made a turn left, but I was confused which lane to turn into. I then slowly moved forward and stopped. I could not see what was directly before me. I felt something was very wrong but did not know what. I sat there for what seemed to be several minutes. Then my awareness about me quickly came back. At this point I was OK and everything was familiar once again. But it is then I found myself driving on the wrong side of the road! LOL

OMG this stuff is coming back to me. I was in that same restaurant at another time speaking to this new freind who I had met there a couple months ago. I started feeling very detached. It is as though a large distance had come between us and his voice melted into the background. I was aware that there were voices of people talking around me. This freind of mine was talking, but I did not know what he was saying. I began to get the feeling that I did not know where I was. I could not remember what we were talking about. I wanted to appear like everything was OK with me. I tried to act this way by continuing to nod my head. Then he said something that sounded really funny to me, so I laughed. But I did not know what he actually said. Then the reality of the situation came back to me.

I then found out he was telling me something that he did when he was young. It was terribly personal, so personal that I felt very uncomfortable listening to it. He was saying that everytime he physically pleasured himself, he ended up feeling very depressed and worthless, and had this overwhelming fear that his life had no meaning. Apparently this is where I found myself laughing. I could not believe I behaved terribly like this toward him. He and I were speachless for several moments. Fortunately, the conversation continued.

OK now, the SHORT of this is that you are not alone in experiencing moments of disassiation. Apparently, this has happened to me more than once. I have read that these moments can happen at times of severe stress. At that time, I was under severe stress as I took care of my mother full time. I think it was around the time she told me she did not know who I was.

I apologize for this long reply. I really do. I just wanted you to know that since I have been OK ever since, even though all of those episodes happened really close to each other. And you will be OK too! There was another episode, but I will stop here. I am becoming a little distressed now.

Tucson