Yup. And she still is. She is a transactional mother for me. She cleaned house, cooked, sewed our clothes, curled our hair, but I only have one memory of her touching me voluntarily, when she stroked my hair briefly with my head on her lap on a car trip. For years I wondered why my greeting kiss ended up on her ear, finally she said how she hates kisses! She was different for her 2 youngest kids, my brother and sister, so she improved as a mother over time and is a really good grandmother. She falls short as my mother though. I don't expect her to change. I'm a very different mother to my daughters, thank goodness!