I'm not atheist. I'm nontheistic. I love the myths of religion, the great stories, the parables. I like to read how others have made sense of life.

I think of depression as a demon. It just wants to suck the joy out of everything. This demon acts omniscient.

You sound depressed. The way you express yourself is how I think and feel when I am depressed.

I am fighting my way out of an 18 month depression and the worst aspect of it has been the bleak self-absorption, and the nihilism. Even if my depressed mind insists nihilism is closer to the truth, I am not happy with it. I would rather be in a somewhat deluded, but optimistic state.