Quote:
Originally Posted by ScientiaOmnisEst
I suppose there isn't a way to tell between actual self-hatred/loathing, and narcissistic attention-seeking.
I actually asked the person who wrote this what the alternative is to self-hatred then. The answer being suicide, self-killing/ego-suspension, or medication.
I also asked what people have that they "don't want to spend", and got this for an answer:
So self-loathing is laziness, a refusal to fix what's wrong, also relying on others for emotional support is exploitation. Or maybe I'm still reactive about this whole thing.
It bugs the hell out of me when I see people act like negative feelings are just the result of laziness: if you would work and achieve things, you wouldn't be depressed, self-loathing, lonely, etc. You just need to make an effort. Well, sometimes an effort is pointless. I know I tend to see the things that are wrong as largely unchangeable; if they're within myself, then yes, I'm going to hate myself for it.
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TBH it's that kind of thinking that made it hard for me to get help because I kept worrying that maybe I'm just faking for attention or I'm just being lazy.
It also made my self loathing worse because why can't I just get better? It took me awhile to admit that I have some problems but even then I doubt myself.
I also had to learn that there's nothing wrong about wanting attention. Monkeys, especially young ones, will try to get the attention of others, usually their moms. Even dogs want attention. We're social creatures so we want to feel included.