I had maternal transference with ex-T. I thought that I should stay and work through it. However, I had many doubts about my therapy. She was inconsistent - started off responding to texts great with emojis and such and then stopped responding, told me she cared about me with tears in her eyes and then months later told me not to ask if she did "and make her regret saying it", suggested I talk to my brother for support and then told me I shouldn't have since he's a T., never admitted she was wrong, always put it back on me and blamed most everything on my transference. I would tell her I'm scared she's going to judge me and she would say it's the transference. I would say she seems frustrated and she would say the transference. I believed her until I got out. I now understand that most of it was NOT the transference - it was her as a person. I ask lots of questions, read and don't take a T's word for it and I don't think she liked being questioned.


A good friend of mine told me one time in response to me crying that she always leaves her therapist's office feeling better. That was a wake up call because that was rare for me. I now think due to my abandonment issues, all these little things were small abandonments that left me feeling insecure and needy. I am not like that AT ALL in my "real life" relationships so this felt so strange.


I think you should overall feel cared for and supported and leave your sessions feeling the same or a little better, not worse. And, if you feel worse it's not due to the actions of your therapist.