I'm very much like you. We do the same things, and think the same way in this sense. I get frustrated that people get so worked up over things I deem minor but I think because I've hardened myself sometimes it's easier for me to see how minor it is in the grand scheme of things whereas some people can't see passed what's right in front of them in that moment.

Avoidance isn't always a good thing because it can lead to avoiding things we're supposed to notice. I find it difficult to be sympathetic at times, all I can do is try and be patient. Your friend sounds like she's more dependant on you than you are on her and maybe she feels like she's being left behind in the healing process because you've found strength where she hasn't. I know it can be frustrating continuously reassuring the same person, but maybe that's all she needs every now and then.

Are you able to talk about it with her? My partner is similar to your friend and can get defensive when I try and talk about needing time to myself when she's being needy.