Quote:
Originally Posted by lostinsidemyself
Undiscriable....is it possible to feel everything at once to not know how you feel other then very unsafe, chest is heavy, shaking, and wishing i could curl up in a corner and disapear?
Wondering how long before it all kills me. Wondering whats at the end of the fight for me.....
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Wow. I could have written this.
Terrified of my ambivalence toward my own safety and life. That feeling of panic like before you give a speech or do something scary constantly over the past month,?but no cause for it other than my fear of myself and that I don't want to get better more than I want to
. Trying to make my small supply of ativan last so that I can get through the worst times.
Just so so so so scared I will not be okay. Scared I don't *want* to be.