Hello Pleaseletlifeend4me: I see this is your first post. Welcome to PsychCentral! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit. From what you wrote, it sounds like you understand your circumstances pretty well but feel powerless to do anything about them. Unfortunately, it's not only you who is suffering... but also your children. So I hope that if you continue to choose to remain in this relationship, you will try to do what you can to help your children to cope. Many of us who are here on PC are here in large part due to experiences we had growing up. I send you my best wishes...