carpassing, glad you did find this group.

You have a fine first post and it is not rambling at all. The comfort in posting and replying to others will come in time. No one ever pushes another into talking about more than is comfortable.

Does sound like you are having a hard time right now. Never feel stupid asking for help...here or on a hotline. When things are crashing one needs to talk to someone, whether it is here or on a hotline.

It would be helpful if you can tell us what the crashing feeling is all about. But, if you are not comfortable with this, then don't. Glad to hear you have already considered finding a therapist...a step in the right direction.

Again, welcome to a wonderful place to find caring, empathetic folks.

Carolyn