yep.. well i was diagnosed at last evaluation with a new psychologist at a hospital...
was basicly because they had mis-diagnosed me with bipolar disorder... but i knew i wasn't bipolar so wanted the second, or third.. or whatever opinion it was - i cant remember :/

did full psychological assessment... iq tests... learning disorders... mental disorders...

but im complicated so its really hard to know for me personally whats going on in my brain.. i just gotta try to take their word for it ...

he said that for me it seems i have no short term memory, problems with retention... my memory is terrible... i scored really bad on that section apparently... ie: having a conversation and stop mid-sentence not remembering what i was saying or just forgetting i was having a conversation all together

i have other symptoms but by far the memory is something that concerns me - would think maybe i have a brain tumor that is causing me to forget everything... but i guess its just adhd...
i mean combined with the anxiety and depression im sure makes it worse :/

im fairly intelligent as well so i know that intelligence can make it look like you are normal - just because you're scanning faster than others and coming up with coping skills to get through the challenges...
also if you have other disorders it can mask or overlap the adhd and make it difficult to diagnose...

i completely understand your frustration

but maybe you could do the type of assessment i did and get a complete diagnosis - it just a little expensive... cost me $1,700... but i dont have any insurance or coverage/help with that stuff currently...

they are worried more about my depression and anxiety though than the adhd because the depression is killing me

i've just tried so many other medications i would like to try adhd medication because like you said it seems like the adhd cycle might be fueling the depression and anxiety sometimes...
read many stories about people suffering with anxiety and depression and later be diagnosed with adhd and treated and the depression/anxiety clearing up...

would like to see if that works for me too

keep trying... stay strong...