I've been catching up on the forums before going to bed. And a happy little thought crossed my mind: I've been so busy writing the biographies for the past two weeks -- and I thought of being busy doing something I enjoy -- "I love this."

Holy moly, when was the last time that I thought, even for a fraction of a second that I "loved" anything in the now. Loving anything about my life has been part of an increasingly distant past.

Okay, so it was a fleeting thought. This afternoon I was terrified about finding an apartment that I like, and how to manage getting my truckload of stuff from Florida to New Orleans. Plus, a friend has arranged for me to be interviewed for a very good job in Boston, and that had thrown me into a tailspin. What if I rent an apartment and have to break the least? Worse, what if I buy a home and have to rent it for 2 years til I can sell it? (For Canadians, Brits, and other non US -- you have to hold a personal home for 2 years before selling it or you get hit with a steep "capital gains tax. And you have to sell for a higher price to cover the "closing costs" of buying and selling.)

So I can make myself a nervous wreck over just about anything -- but how wonderful to have this thought -- that I love something about my life.

And I know that happened partly because of all the love and support I've received on the forums. I really think that people here have helped to save my life. Or at least, to help give me back a life that may even be worth living one of these days.