Meds help me. Deadlines help me, like "clean up your apartment or the city will evict you" - its making me move past psychological barriers, having to choose the lesser of two evils. I hate to admit it, but i am grateful i am being forced to take these actions (to get healthier, to clean the apartment). I have always been deadline driven in school and work. Not a good thing really. It helps that both my parents are dead now and nobody is moping if i do well for myself. I can clean my apartment and not anticipate criticism from the family. That its not good enough, that im not good enough.