I'll try to be concise for once:

I have no idea where I stand in terms of being sociable, introverted/extraverted. On one hand, I usually prefer to be alone, to not even have others around. Though, I am addicted to talking to people online - so I can't, and don't relate to people who, say, could happily spend their entire lives alone, who have zero needs or desires for social interaction. I also probably romanticize interaction a little, I sometimes imagine myself in relationships, frequently fantasize about success in the eyes of others, imagine myself being able to speak and interact happily with others yet regularly feel a confused loneliness.

That's the point: confused. Like, I want someone around, but I know that if I got it, I wouldn't know what to do with them. Or I'd feel awkward and exposed and want to be alone again. I'm not schizoid or an extreme introvert. But I'm no extravert by anyone's definition; not even ambiverted. But that doesn't stop me from feeling lonely - it it's even loneliness, and not just sadness.

I guess...I'm convinced this is a character flaw. A sign that I'm less intelligent, less evolved even. That I'm weak and inferior for being so needy, for not being able to sustain myself with my own mind like other, smarter, stronger, better people can. Apparently schizoid traits and/or strong introversion are linked with giftedness, so there's that...

I guess...can anyone convince me otherwise? ^^' Trust me, I hate feeling this way...but it just seems so obvious that this is how things work.