t,

you started off talking about my eating disorder behaviors and i let us talk about that for a bit but then i said can we talk about something else!!!!! so i brought up the death stuff. you said you DO think about your dad dying. i know its not an easy question to answer- how does one accept death?? you gave me some tips. i think the biggest one was that i have all my eggs in one basket, or two really, you and my mom. you said right? and i said yes. you said most people my age are looking for a partner. UMM WHAT i dont want a partner!!! YOU KNOW THAT!!! i am not even remotely ready for that. i dunno, T, i know i am isolated and need friends. but how?? how do u make new friends when ur almost 30 and dont go to bars and drink?? idk what i am even going with this i just... i just wish i wasnt me

but i am
..
me