Passionfruit, we are talking about YOUR life here. If you are having trouble and anxiety then postpone a semester of school for a little bit. Go talk to a counselor and see if you can get some inpatient therapy. You need some guidance from others to give you the tools to make it on your own. At some point we all get old enough to where we lose family members, but life gives us friends to fill the void. Go to a counselor and to a peer support group if you can. This is most helpful for here is your equals helping you go through the process with them by your side, the same things. (((hugs))) tc