I would be curious to know what kind of meditation.
I completely flipped out about a week ago. People here will tell you. I posted about 50 times in a day. I was in a real crisis.
I read about this meditation/walking thing...but you know how it is...to trust that doing something different than from what you are doing is going to help.
Believe me, I relate to what you are saying. I just don't self-harm in drastic ways...but maybe in subtle ways...such as procrastinating doing important stuff.
Yeah, we are helper buddies now!