For half a year now, I've been struggling with PTSD and I started seeing a counselor not too long after the flashbacks started because I was required to by the school. I was speaking with her for a few months off and on because I wasn't a big fan of "sharing my feelings" with someone I didn't really know. After a certain amount of time I began seeing a therapist at a community center (started a month ago) and I also began taking a few different antidepressants. Nothing's helped so far and my flashbacks started getting even more intense and so did my inability to tell whether or not I'm dreaming. Sure, medication stopped me from having several panic attacks in an hour but it decreased my ability to tell whether or not anything's actually real. I'm also having a hard time with something else. Recently (over the past two weeks) I've been having a lot of unwanted thoughts about killing myself. I'm beginning to agree with them and its hard to fight off these emotions when I can't help but see the logic in them. I don't want to eat anymore, I don't want to do anything that I'd normally enjoy and I can't even see the point in attending school or anything. I just don't care about any of it. Today I haven't taken my medication and I cancelled any future therapy appointments. I just don't want to talk about it anymore, I can't. I guess I'm wondering, especially with the inability to tell whether or not my surroundings are real, if I need to go to a hospital?