Well, after a sleepless, freaking out night, I've decided what I'm going to do.

First of all, refusing to take certain meds isn't non med compliant in my opinion. Everything I'm prescribed I am taking. Had I known med compliant entailed doing everything my pdoc said I would have handled things differently. My 90 day thing was up april 3rd. Yeah. Sucky. I was almost there.

Second I'm going to explain my situation to those two psychiatrists I have to be evaluated by and hopefully they'll let me off.

Third, if I end up on the six month thing, I'm going to pretend I'm taking the risperdal... But they're going to have to shove depakote down my throat. I AM NOT going on something where I have to have levels checked, could potentially lose my hair and gain a ton of weight and destroy my liver.

If I get out of the 6 month thing I'm going to pretend to do what she wants and april 3rd I'm going to tell her to **** off, fire her, make an appointment with my primary and ask if there's anyone else she can refer me too. If not I'll ask her to do my refills for me.

Thanks everyone for the support! You've all helped me feel better.