Hi everyone,

I have a lot of struggles with intimacy and I will try to write it down as short as possible.

I am 20 years old and have a history of depression , self injury and eating disorders. I was also emotionally abused by my mother. I never had a boyfriend before because I was suffering from depression for years. Currently i am dating a really nice guy. (For the first time)

I like him a lot , but when he hugs me , I get anxious. I feel so awkward and lost. I feel like i am doing it all wrong and that he will stop liking me soon. Today we kissed for the first time and i almost wanted to cry because i am insecure(even though he said i'm a great kisser..) I am always convinced that I do everything horribly wrong. I can't even think of having sex. I will probably faint because of the fear..

Does someone recognize this or can give me some advice?

Thanks in advance.

Elin