I DO understand. I felt that I should be "punished" for "letting" myself get attacked - the relationships that immeadialy follwed were some of my worst! It seems you have the answer already, and I know how much courage and strength it's going to take to "do the right thing" - whatever that may be for you. When to get involved again - only you can answer that for yourself. I hope this helps, even a lillte. I look forward to finding out what you decide. Feel free to PM about it if you don't want it posted.