It seems a common problem, a therapist changing the boundaries in therapy, and it's very painful to go through as a client because it reenacts inconsistent parenting and abandonment issues from childhood. You would think this would be obvious to them.
My first therapist did things similar to this and it was confusing and painful.
Current T has been really consistent in the way he responds to email (usually answers with a line or two, but doesn't respond if the issue seems like something best left for therapy).
Sorry your T is not understanding your needs on this