I just finished up the day hospital and was inpatient before that. I just finished a round of ECT. So going back so soon is really not an option.

Right now the suicidal ideations are getting bad again and I do have plans but no intentions.

My therapist constantly asks me about my thoughts, plans and intentions. Yesterday I refused to tell her. So she could probably guess for herself.

The brain zaps I am having right now are really bothering me. I don't want to do ECT again. My memory is terrible.

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