I send you my hugs and I understand you. I'm passing through something similar and I had a rebound of my OCD along with Depression and Anxiety. It's hard controlling your thoughts and your feelings. What I'm doing and what my therapist (who does CBT) is mindfulness, a breathing exercise of living in the now, the now and what is happening. About work I concur with you, one of my greatest fears is having to work 14 hours a day, living poor without able to pay my medicine and having somebody to take care of. The sheer stress and suffering it would entail and the image of me breaking my back and crying impotent to the world made me want to vomit. For that, I'm also doing exercise and I working in writing all this thoughts and fears the moment they came to relax.

I do three hearing prayers to calm myself, to battle depression, anxiety and OCD:

Silva Method, you can find it in youtube. They allow me to take out my stress.

Compassionate Abiding: to not hurt oneself, to let the pain (or in your case, the desire of hurting yourself) be so you can forgive them and heal them.

Ho'oponopono. I honestly don't know what mp3 recommend you since I use mp3, but this helped me to maintain my workload (you know, it took me 10 years to finish my career because problems never seemed to end, paperwork lost, I had troubles with my groups and became addicted to the internet) and to allow me to feel control of my life and of my morality.

I truly hope something I had said will help you. Take care and may you grow stronger and healthier. See ya.