Little update: after goofing off this morning, I decided to go lie down and just chill and get away from everything so I could think. I wound up for a couple hours but I think it helped. So many other weeks when I've gotten to this point I've just kind of given up and said, "Well I'll just go back to work for one more week and figure it out next weekend." Today however I find that thought nauseating. I can't keep going on like this.

So I've resolved that at some point this evening I'm going to sit down and make a list of what (I think) I want to do and where I may want to live. Enough settling and just getting by. This has to stop.