Quote:
Originally Posted by junkDNA
You mentioned it's been a year since the incident with your ex T. It is totally understandable that you are still upset and affected by what happened a year later. It takes a lot of time to heal from these things and everyone is different. Try not to judge where you are today and think you should be feeling this or that by now. I know that's really hard to do though. It's been 6 years since I told about my former T. I can say that throughout all those years the intensity of my pain has lessened which I attribute to learning healthy coping skills... but it doesn't mean I don't still hurt sometimes over what happened. Healing and recovery journeys aren't linear...there are ups and downs and backwards steps... I hope you can find some compassion for yourself and what you've been through.
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Thank you! It seems ridiculous sometimes that it's taken me over a year just to get to *this* point because of a relationship that lasted just a little bit over 5 years. The worst part is the urge to reach out and tell her I miss her, but then I'm reminded of the things she did and the pain she caused me. And of course, I run the risk that she won't respond or she'll tell me never to contact her again, which would be the worst humiliation. I know she damaged me, but why do I miss her so much? It's so hard.