Hey, far as I remember as a little kid I didn't care about gender roles, I understood through out history if born biologically female they like to cook & clean wear pink ect.. males are marcho sports & do the dirty jobs like plumbing ect...

I just don't get why so important in society just seems black & white when I was a kid it bothered me.
I hate the colour pink after awhile realising their are choices for shorts I hated wearing a dress, when I was starting to grow breasts I was disheartened and menstrual cycle seemed to be added to the list just didn't felt right for me, never seen myself as a mummy of sorts.

As a teen kept asking myself am I both genders or just male instead of female? Do I have no gender? Im just me.

Now in my 20s I still question it I even tried to push the questioning away in my head always resurfacing just feel adds to my depression at times.

I think my major issue is I don't always feel comfortable with having breasts it really bothers me "why do I get these bouncing heavy balloons?" I been fixated wanting a flat chest since my teens some days I don't mind them, pro nouns can bother me even though no ones fault I don't mention it to anyone but for example "she & her" doesn't bother me as much but when people come up say "hey woman" or "hey little lady" seems to struck a cord.

Apart for wanting a flat chest no menstrual cycle I like a shaven legs & arms but feel not match to my gender I had guy friends since I was kid but lost many once came into adult seems to be a thing if your friends with a guy could mean more even though completely untrue.

I think I relate more to masculinity I guess but sometimes I like wearing eye make up I think both genders can wear I most days wear no make up.

It shouldn't bother me but it does I think reason why does is fear that no one will ever accept me if I find out what gender I am.

I kept bouncing the label of genderfluid or Agender.