why do i find it necessary to compare myself and my pain to others? I am in a bible study group on Sunday pm. My husband makes me go and sometimes it is good, but others bleh. The last couple of weeks have been hard and I even reached out to some of the women of the church. Yet, when one asked me how I was on Sunday night, my response was the usual, "I'm okay". Why did i lie like that ? because we had a new visitor that night. The mother of a 15 year old boy that was killed in a senseless car accident. I felt that I couldn't share my pitiful reasonless depression in a room with someone who truly had a reason to be in pain. How silly is that ?! But all I could think was that I have 3 healthy grown children, a husband who tries to understand me, and 3 beautiful grandchildren. What right do I have to feel pain in the presence of this woman who has endured so much? And yet the truth is that I am still hurting. I am starting to see glimmers of light, but the hopelessness remains.
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