Maybe your love language is just different than your wife's...it doesn't make hers wrong...just different & even though she's not willing to read the book & do the exercises, I'm sure that by reading the book & knowing your wife, you can pretty much guess correctly what her love language is.

Just because you feel love starved....maybe she does to because you might not be fulfilling her love language either.

Gary Chapman is very good in this specialty area. I have listened to him often on the radio but haven't read the book. No need because I left my H 8 1/2 years ago for many serious reasons that couldn't be fixed by a love language when his ability to communicate even in the english language never existed in the first place.

There could be more serious issues underlying the incompatibility between you & your wife. I know the issues I had with respect for my H turned me off from wanting to have sex with him from the beginning of our marriage. I didn't see this until after I left 33 years later & was able to see the big picture & not just the everyday problems. Sometimes we agree to get married for reasons that aren't just love though we think it is at the time. Sometimes little things we think about the guy before we get married we think will change & sometimes thise negative feelings end up getting reinforces rather than resolved & it's a turn off when it comes to wanting to have sex with this person we thought we got married to because we loved them....but those things that mess with our respect for them block the desire for sex rather than inspire it.

It may be that your marriage has more wrong with it than just sex. Is there something about your bast, or your behavior that is turning your wife off rather than turning her on toward you....because if there is,....that is what needs to be worked on....not the issues regarding sex