Thanks you guys for your support. I was seeing a therapist at a place that did let me pay a small amount but when I started working I couldn't make it there anymore. I get home too late and I have to use public transportation so I would be getting home way too late, like close to 10:00. I don't want to be out waiting on the bus at night, plus I need to be in bed early. So that ended that. I really needed it too, it was my only outlet. I am working on getting a car now that I have some money coming in but we are so behind its not happening as quickly as I had hoped. Yes I know my friends and family are uncomfortable with my moods and just want to stay away and not have to deal with it basically. I guess I should be the bigger person and just accept that and still try to have a relationship with them but the thing is that is what I have been trying to do. I decided to let it go and try to make things right and nobody seems to want to be bothered. These are people I really thought I could trust. I am just blown away by this. When I was in the midst of the full blown depression these boards did help a lot. They were my only outlet and the Samaritans. I just think its sad that people can't try harder with people they claim to love. Well I'm done beating my head against a wall. If they want to talk to me they can, I am not trying anymore. I am beyond hurt. Anyway thanks for your comments and support.

Bree.