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pinksoil
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Default Sep 06, 2007 at 08:53 PM
 
When I feel so small with T I take the cushion from the chair and hold it like a stuffed animal. This started in the session when I used the couch. I sat up on the couch and looked at T and then just pointed to the chair. I didn't have the words. He said, "Of course... go ahead and sit in the chair." And I took the pillow and held it tight for the rest of the session.

In winter I sometimes put my coat over me like a blanket.

This is so embarrassing, but sometimes I wish I could bring a stuffed animal with me to session. I can't hold him. I want to hold something.

Sometimes I am okay with getting small around him. I feel little and protected. Taken care of. Like the couch session. Other times I feel small in terms of feeling like stupid, weak little kid who can't measure up to T and has to let him dictate every single thing that I feel.

Sometimes I feel like that with my husband too.
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