Hi, everyone! It's been quite some time since I've come here for advice as I'd rather just lug about in the world as of late presuming that life will improve with sheer optimism.

Introduction since it's been a while:

I'm Melanie, I'm 26 years old, have Bipolar 1 disorder with occasional psychosis (hospitalized three times for it, consecutively... which wasn't all bad considering that I was manic and, hence, spent the time that I wasn't zonked on antipsychotics enthusiastically chatting and coloring with everyone in the hospital).

Without further ado, onto the topic...!
If anyone can or is willing to react to this or lend me a spot of wisdom, I'd really appreciate it.

I've been in a relationship with someone for roughly a year and a half and we have a six month old son together (stranger/less convenetional things have happened, I'm sure).

Let me start by mentioning that our choice to keep our child was mutual. Even still, I had a miserable pregnancy. Every night after work (usually as late as 5-7am since he worked at a bar), he would come home wasted and would never tell me where he was. All the while, I was suffering from hormonal chaos mixed with my bipolar disorder... I left him because he wasn't there for me, which I immediately regreted. A week after I left, he had a romantic relationship with a co-worker (who wasn't pregnant, who was able to drink, etc.), but would occasionally message me that he still loved me. Despite all of that nonsense, I perused him for a solid month and a half and we got back together, baby was born, co-worker no longer in the picture, yadayada.

To the present...
The positives: he loves me, he loves Jude, he works hard at his job (I also have a job, but mine is part-time), he cleans some on his day off and does the laundry (although he is always angry about it, because he thinks that it is my duty to do so despite that I'm working, raising his child, offering to cook for him, taking care of him when he's sick, and clean as much as I can before he arrives at home very late... oh, and there us that whole bipolar illness I have to deal with also)
The negatives: he's disrespectful, he goes out with friends to drink after work instead of being with his family, even if I'm cooking for him (example- he once stumbled in and ate the dinner I made for him... which took hours to make... with his hands), he lies to me very often, he rarely takes care of Jude (our child) unless he absolutely has to... in which case I'm always a bit frightened. He's unapologetic whenever he's mean to me, despite that I am always apologizing.

In short...
I'm a romantic. I want to have a family with someone whom I love, and whom loves my son and myself... so I want to be with him, but I don't know how long I should continue to be patient with him. I encourage him nicely to make more responsible decisions (i.e. "Would you like to have dinner with me tonight? I'm cooking!" ..things to bring him home). I give him back massages, I even got my part-time job to make him happy, since he would always use the fact that he has a job and I don't in order to belittle me.

****Question****
Will he grow to make more responsible decisions and learn to be kind to me? Is he just stressed (not that that's an excuse for rudeness, but I can at least empathize)? Perhaps once Jude is a little older (i.e. in six months) there will be less stress on our relationship in general? ...or should I start creating a plan to provide for myself and Jude that doesn't include him? And yet, if there isn't any hope, wouldn't it be best to leave now instead if causing Jude the emotional trauma of his parents seperating?

I find myself watching couples at work, and most of the men are very sweet to their partners... that's what I'd like to have.

Thank you for reading! Sorry it was long. Please help, if you can.
-Melanie.

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