Thanks for the advice, Tisha and vg. Because of pirilin's comment, though, I'm probably going to leave this forum again. I'd forgotten that asking for advice online begets rude comments as well... and I have enough social stress to deal with as is and certainty don't want to create anymore. I guess that it used to be friendlier here a few years back.
Thank you again, to those whom offered advice.

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Edit/side note- I'll continue talking to my psychiatrist about it. Ty guys.