Thank you for holding on. I've lived on the other side of someone taking his life for almost six years. Please don't do that. It affects everyone around you, even the person who you see at the convenience store or check you out at the grocery (true). I have MDD recurrent. Right now it's recurring. I wouldn't know normal if it walked up and introduced itself. It's been so long. I don't have a therapist or pdoc. Wish I did. Just keep going to see them and hopefully for all's sake you will feel better soon.