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Old Mar 23, 2016, 06:01 PM
Anonymous50005
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Originally Posted by ladyrevan21 View Post
She basically said she didn't know of any resources that could help me. Also that actually, well, trying to heal myself and get through this is actually not the best strategy (I'm just thinking of reading stuff on

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just to sort out my concerns and, more importantly, heal the issues I have, because whatever I experienced I do need to heal from it). I just...I swear next therapy session, I am getting a new therapist, because it's clear that she can't help me.
Kind of an in-between cbt and working on history is rebt. My therapist was primarily behavioral, but used a variety of modalities, working to keep me primarily moving forward in my present while resolving my past. If you are looking for a resource that might be helpful, one book my therapist recommended to me was The Anxiety & Phobia Workbook by Bourne (if I remember correctly). He didn't ask me to read all of it, but kind of in the middle of the book are two or three chapters that basically outline the rebt approach to working through current issues while exploring the past and how that past comes up in our present. The middle chapters were over mistaken beliefs (things we've come to believe about ourselves because of our history/past experiences that continue to affect our present) and self talk (that inner dialogue we have with ourselves because of those mistaken beliefs).

I found those two or three chapters helpful. There was a set of questions to work through that has you explore exactly where that self talk came from in your life. It was something I read through quickly the first time, and then later, when I was ready, I really took some time to work through and journal through on my own. It took awhile and was difficult work actually. I gained some good and helpful insights that also helped me understand more what my therapist was trying to explain about that connection between my past and my present. He also wasn't big on spending too much time rehashing my abuse history; he really believed too much time spent doing that without a very specific purpose in the present often causes more trauma rather than healing. When I worked through the exercises in this book I started seeing more of the connections and it did help our sessions become for focused on exactly what I needed to process and revisit in order to move forward, and what could be left right back there in my past.

Just a suggestion since you mentioned finding resources. It seems like I've seen parts of the book reproduced on the internet somewhere, but you could glance through a copy at a bookstore and get an idea if it might something helpful. Again, you may not need the whole book. My T just particularly liked the simplicity and directness and helpful guide provided in those chapters.
Thanks for this!
ladyrevan21