My heart goes out to you. The situation you are in would be tough on anyone and could make even the strongest and kindest person crack. Please don't be too hard on yourself. You need help right now and you recognize this. That is a good place to start. I think you are on to something with the group therapy idea. Reaching out is a good idea. You definitely need some help and professional advise on this situation, but please remember to be kind to yourself. I hope you get the support you need quickly.