Hi all, thankyou for all the replies, I thought I'd update on the situation.
Things are going remarkably well, I've met knew friends, my new place is really cool (very small but cool). Living on my own I've found a huge amount of strength and confidence. My children stay with me as often as possible and we enjoy our time together. Finances aren't great but we aren't going to go bankrupt anytime soon. If you have been following the thread, the catalyst for my turn around were basically advice to focus on thinking about my children and me rather than wasting energy on being negative and bitter. Simple stuff but incredibly effective.
I've managed to forgive my ex although only in my head, I still can't tell her she's in the clear.
I can't quite believe the turn around and have to keep checking dates to see if the timescale is correct.
I've even met someone, a Buddhist, who pursued me ( I wasn't looking at all).
I have tough times ahead when the house sale and divorce comes into focus but I've been worrying about stuff all my life and things still happen-don't happen anyway.
I'm enjoying the moment, for the first time in years I'm not under any criticism or pressure to do things the way someone else wants it.
I hope this gives encouragement to others that no matter how dark it gets, there is always hope that situations can change for the better.
Stay positive, it's the only way forward. X

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