I'm a lot like this too, and no normal therapist ever helped me with this. Now that I have been referred up so many times, I'm in a program where everyone is pretty severely sick (to end up here you have to have been referred up at least 3 times), and they do a lot of this kind of support in therapy. It took me almost a full year just to get my eating good enough that I wasn't depending on iron shots. For me it helps to have someone help me do it slowly and also to hold me accountable. We worked out a meal plan (I also saw a nutritionist), and print out the sheets every week checked off *still* to help me with the eating. We added vitamins, meds, water, because sadly I needed that. One small cleaninh task a week or none if I still hadn't done one the week before, ideas to stop me from compulsively picking and being late. The slow pace, support, and the accountability helped a lot. Now we're adding in 15 mins exercise because the snow is melting and I'm unemployed. We also added in one "fun" activity and a list of things to relax (watch movies, color, etc), because I was so bad at taking care of myself I couldn't even figure out how to have fun at my worst. I bring in my mail if i'm nervous or too lazy to open it and answer it. I have gotten better, my physical health at least is much better. This week my honework was to go see a doctor about my faintness and schedule a pap test. Bit by bit. But it does help. My therapist helps me with all this, but within the hospital/medical model and at this level it seems to be common. Have you thought of trying to get a social worker? They're usually the ones who help with all this basic stuff. Maybe you could work with a social worker on the concrete stuff and a T on the self-esteem stuff that goes with it?

It's been a huge relief finally getting support in learning to take care of myself from the bottom up. You can know in your head what you need to do but have trouble doing it.

Maybe you need more help than they realize. A lot of depressed people have trouble taking care of themselves. It's also less scary to make small changes. I'm kind of afraid of trying to get better too.