Quote:
Originally Posted by 1976kitchenfloor
There are two different choices every one of us can make based on how we answer one question: Do I want to continue to live my life as I am doing now, or does my illness/condition negatively affect my life so much I want to make the choices/ do the work necessary to make it better?
Clearly, from what you have written on your posts , your life is basically in shambles and you say you are all over the place emotionally and reality wise. On the other hand, you also have posted that you are attention seeking and a drama queen. I make a guess on this but assume you like all the attention some of the crazier postings here give you. That is not the best thing for you. Being healthy needs to be more important that being 'out there.'
For example, have you considered that publicly encouraging your separation via alters by giving them so much press and attention might be terribly counterproductive and contributes to your chaos and confusion with regard to being able to distinguish what is real from what isnt real?
Your alters dont need to be validated by anyone but you. Alters are unconsciously created as a self defense, in reaction to terrible life and soul threatening early childhood trauma. It is those early childhood expereinces and associated feelings that in time you will work through via therapy and learn to face and accept as your own. That is the essence of recovery and integration.
I wish you well. Take care.
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Steve: okay, well....consider this....there isnt a "you" per say....a single that is afflicted by alters? We dont have "alters". We all just happen to have to fight for time in the same body. So, if I got to sit here an accept responsibility for something an Other did (you got to prove it for one) ....
Alters are also created for coping skills one has never learned or feared learning. For every social skill we were deprived, an Other was created to handle that skill.
Did you know that the physical nature of dissociation that scientists are learning to discover is that the hippocampus of the brain, the part responsible for the laying down of memories or location of memory parts is abnormally undersized? To me, this says certain people are prone to dissociation more then others while some don't dissociate at all. It can't handle trauma like a normal one can. Now throw 18 years worth of trauma at it....then you unfortunately have us. We happen to dissociate at an itch. We are poly-fragmented which means we've over hundreds of hundreds of Others, so just picking to be a whole person from our perspective is really kind of a hard thing to do...like those others like us. Thank God we don't have it worse because there are plenty of others a lot of far worse than us....bless them.