One of the hardest things to learn in my marriage was that we had to be able to be honest with each other, including about our frustrations about each other, AND that just because we communicate our frustration doesn't mean we have to feel guilty about it. Not communicating those frustrations just creates more frustration; being able to just voice it, relieves the tension so we can move on. We don't have to feel guilty about being honest, AND we don't have to fix each other's frustrations. They just are what they are.

I live on both sides of the equation. I have had my mental health issues and so has my husband. My husband has serious physical health issues. Yes, we get frustrated at times when we feel like we are having to deal with each others' health issues, both mental and physical. It's perfectly normal; we're human. We've learned we can be honest about that without it really being about the other person -- that it is really more about us and our feelings at the time. We can be there to allow each other to be open about that, say thank-you for telling me or thank-you for listening, and we can move on. Arriving at that place in our marriage was the point when we truly learned to be honest and validating toward each other. We spent FAR too many years hiding our illness and our feelings from each other to try to protect each other and make each other feel better. It nearly destroyed our marriage. The honesty is much easier and healthier in the long-run and our marriage has never been better.