Quote:
Originally Posted by divine1966
People do change. As a person used to drink and now quit. Or used to be lazy and now works out. Or was a spender and now learnt to be frugal.
Not as "used to drug and rape minor girls and now is upstanding citizen". Very unlikely.
Please do see a therapist
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Yes, I guess you are right, its unlikely a rapist would change the way people can change in other things. And if a rapist was young, like 20, and became ashamed as a grown man of what he did, he would have made an attempt to be sad about it and not tell me it was nice and wild. I am thinking also, does he not see it as rape as he comes from a rape culture. I have no idea as he seems to think of what happened as normal or not wrong.
If I go to a therapist I hope I can understand why I am drawn to a person who I know did me wrong. I know already that survivos of rape and abuse respond positively on danger and more likely dont see the danger. Because of trauma. But if a therapist can help me besides telling me all this what I already know, then it would be good.