Quote:
Originally Posted by brandon9
I appreciate your well-wishes. I have made peace with myself, at this point - I'm not scared of fires, I help my friends family as much as I possibly can since that accident, and I never have felt guilty about shooting that bastard that came into my house, but I think THAT was a defining moment in my life for sure. I realized I'm not scared to do what I have to do to survive in this world, dramatic as it may sound. I never wish that decision on anyone though, it weighs on you like nothing else ever will. Even if the guy lives.
If I may ask, are you religious? Do you believe in a God, or an afterlife of any sort? I admit I may be totally wrong in assuming this, but I get the vibe that you may be athiest. Again, I may be wrong. I bring this up because I haven't really encountered many religious people with this fear of "ceasing to exist", as you put it. Please don't mistake me for pushing religion - I am not overly religious myself, I don't attend church and I admit to having some doubt about God and etc - but I feel as if maybe that, if applicable, could be an underlying cause for your fear, subconsciously or some such way. Or I could be entirely wrong. If so I apologize.
As for your therapist... I would say it might help distract you, as ciderguy pointed out, if you had a relationship or family, but he's also probably shooting a bit of **** too by saying that. That's just my opinion though.
|
I was born in an atheist family, but later in my life I had become more religious. I was even baptized, but recently I've realized that I have no faith left. I have no idea whether God exists, but I just can't continue visiting church while my belief withers away. I don't want to be a hypocrite, whose belief is only in his words, not his heart. It was a painful realization and it still hurts. I feel lost. Now any theological or philosophical discussion triggers my existential dread.
As for the therapist, I too didn't believe him. He apparently has a kid(possibly a very young one) and maybe he ment that my problems can't compare to his. During the whole time together my therapist mostly emphasized on importance of getting a sexual partner and social interaction. When I said that having kids for me is a very long if feasible perspective and that I haven't thought about kids at all, he replied that I can't postpone it because of biological reasons. I feel like he doesn't understand me and thinks that sex and marriage will "heal all of my wounds". I actually consider leaving him, but I don't know where to go. Now that I think, maybe his message was about filling your life with lots of distractions, such as girlfriend, friends, family, kids, etc?.
Anyways, I wish everybody good luck and enjoy your life.