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Old Mar 29, 2016, 12:42 PM
tearsinabottle tearsinabottle is offline
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Member Since: May 2015
Location: Stavanger
Posts: 344
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lazarus16 View Post
Then he is an even emptier person than I thought. You don't exist just to amuse him, you're not a clown! When I was dating, if my girlfriend was out with friends, I'd go to the gym, go watch a movie, go out with friends, you know, have fun. Because one of the key to live an happy life is to make your own happiness. You can't rely on others because they can't always be there for you and if they can't and you can't make your own happiness, you'll be sad and all desoriented. Using others to fill a void in ourselves is a recipe for disaster. That's why some people survive break-ups and find someone in a matter of days and some people fall into depression.

You did nothing wrong, he was just annoyed that you were not there to amuse him, forcing him to do nothing in his miserable life and I say, good for him! You don't owe him anything and he has A LOT of work to do if he wants to one day, live an happy life, living REAL love relationships.
I did react when he said "bad". Even he joked, I know the tactics some abusers use to make you feel you have done something wrong. I know I didnt do anything wrong even I was made to feel that way. It might have been my own feelings I projected on myself. Maybe he didnt mean it that way, but I felt it this way. Anyway I know I didnt do anything wrong.

Its right, I am not a clown who should sit like a duck. I am only wondering what could be behind his joking "pity play". If it was just a joke for fun, some people joke for fun like this, or if he really tried the pity play to see how I reacted.