i dont have any friends, so i won't say too much... as my heart and soul have been hardened by years of self neglect...

but would it have been different if these friends just died?
they would be gone from your life then, but maybe it wasnt really a conscious choice of theirs, you would have 2 options in my opinion... to wallow in the misery of their absence... or to cherish and keep close to you the dear memories of the time you spent with them?
things begin, things end... this is life... there is no absolute besides the absolute that there is not... don't let attachments control your life... because things will come and things will go... just as soon as something begins another thing will be ending...

its all a perspective, how you perceive it and interpret it... so take the good things, leave the bad things, move forward and invite the new things to begin while the old things end...

i have also opened myself to people and put trust where i shouldn't have, thinking that it could be eternal, but that is very very rare.... so i have learned to take what i get, go with the flow... losing a friend makes anyone sad, but you only lose the person that may of changed, and that person isnt your friend anymore because they have changed, what you can keep is the friend in that person that you knew - keep in your memories - and cherish what was there, but understand that life is cruel like a powerful flowing river... it carves the earth and changes pathways... all of these things in life are temporary... so we have to keep moving with the river, or else we'll drown in the current trying to fight for something that is not there...

you have friends here on this forum, even though we dont know each other... people will be your friend here, be friendly to you here, support you, those kind of things...

but as others have said, sometimes we have to distance ourselves and take time off because we are also hurting and struggling... its not against you in anyway, its just a battle that we are all fighting...

i hope that this msg doesnt make you mad or anything, im not trying to be mean... its just this is how i see things... life is temporary... we have to keep moving - with the gains and the losses... if we fight the current and try to remain in the same place, well the flow moves on anyway without us and we'll just be stuck not getting anywhere at all - fighting against the current is bad thing in my opinion...

let things happen in life... sometimes they are things that we dont want to happen, but sometimes those things happen so that good things that we do want to happe will happen... like, do you think the water desires to fall over a cliff ? i don't... but at the bottom when the water settles it calms down and looks so peaceful

im sorry about my metaphors... im not good at explaining these kind of things because my mind is complicated...

just try not to invest too much in other people... invest more in yourself, take what you can from other people and invest it in yourself... dont invest it in others....

i'll be your friend here, but dont rely on me because when people rely on me it scares me and i dont want to hurt anyone so i distance myself... people cant rely on me because i can barely rely on myself...


stay strong man...